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<\/p>\nSomething happens. That\u2019s the story of growing up. Something happens and it gets more complicated. That is the story of growing up.<\/p>\n
Oftentimes I think I\u2019d be happiest if my life were simple. Shed the influences, the encumbrances, the responsibilities and then happiness has space to grow. There is a problem here though. To take these things away would leave me isolated, cut off and powerless. That doesn\u2019t sound like a recipe for happiness.<\/p>\n
There was some moment I thought through this problem and came to a conclusion I\u2019ve stuck with for years now. (Maybe I read it or heard it or dreamt it, I don\u2019t know, but it\u2019s mine now.) The nature of life is to complicate in time.<\/p>\n
Maybe complicate isn\u2019t quite right. Life gets more complex, or my feelings are more complex over time. My thoughts are. Situations and relationships braid together, overlap and mash together into a Gordian knot that feels too heavy to untangle.
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If only I could reach for Alexander\u2019s blade, slice through it all and make life simple again. But this is a cheat, an unmaking that freezes the very process of life. Deeper down I want my life to become more complex over time.<\/p>\n
I don\u2019t need to slice through the knot because I am the knot. The best parts of life are in the little loops, the threads overlapping fuzz balls under tangled yarns. That\u2019s where joy is possible. If the devil is in the details, the angel is too.<\/p>\n
Its not easy though. And I\u2019m not perfect, sometimes I\u2019m not willing to grow. I know where I keep my detachment knife. It\u2019s next to the ghosting, denial and willingness to ignore problems. But when I don\u2019t face change, I regret it. Sometimes for years. There is some grace though in that my regrets get tied in with all the rest of it. And I can accept them, because life is complex and so am I.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
Something happens. That\u2019s the story of growing up. Something happens and it gets more complicated. That is the story of growing up. Oftentimes I think I\u2019d be happiest if my life were simple. Shed the influences, the encumbrances, the responsibilities and then happiness has space to grow. There is a problem here though. To take…<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[6],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-4747","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-photo-journal"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/astroblastro.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/4747","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/astroblastro.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/astroblastro.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/astroblastro.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/astroblastro.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=4747"}],"version-history":[{"count":7,"href":"https:\/\/astroblastro.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/4747\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":4759,"href":"https:\/\/astroblastro.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/4747\/revisions\/4759"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/astroblastro.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=4747"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/astroblastro.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=4747"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/astroblastro.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=4747"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}